20 Rules For Camping

Camping: some people love it, some people hate it, some people don’t know how to do it. Actually, a lot of people don’t seem to know how to do it. Whether it’s brining a mini-fridge to the campsite and asking where to plug it in or not knowing how to store your food so bears don’t get it, we’ve seen a lot of horrible camping mistakes. That’s why we’ve compiled these 20 can’t-miss rules for camping out. Next time you’re about to strap on your pack and hit the trail, check this list to make sure you’re not forgetting anything important!

1. Camping vs. Homelessness: Know The Difference

This is not camping. This is spending all your money on a car and not being able to pay your mortgage. There IS a difference.

2. Camping Requires Wilderness

This, also, is not camping. You must be near at least one tree, rock, or other form of nature to be camping. This is mindless consumerism.

3. The More The Merrier

Just make sure whoever sleeps on the top isn’t a sleepwalker.

4. Think Before You Gun It

If you want your camping neighbors to like you, don’t do this to their tents. Really, don’t do this to their tents even if you don’t care if they like you. It’s just not very nice.

5. If You Wanna Go Hard, Go Hard…

…but you don’t have to.

6. Leave The Modern Conveniences At Home

Camping is about appreciating nature, getting back to our roots as nomadic hunter-gatherers, and toughing it out. Not bringing your air conditioning with you. How will you hear the crickets?

7. Just Because You Saw It In A Movie Doesn’t Mean You Should Do It In Real Life

Unless the people in question really, really deserve it.

8. The Right Equipment Can Make All The Difference

You’re safe from bears. Your food is safe from bears. Has anyone ever had a better idea in the history of camping? We think not.

9. Make Sure You Know The Difference Between Camping and Safaris

Camping: tent. Safari: jeep. Camping: bear. Safari: lion. Got it?

10. Seriously, Though, Keep The Electronics At Home

Some speakers for music? Ok. A phone for emergencies? Fine. But your whole hi-tech gaming set up? Uh, no!

11. Having A Sense of Humor is Handy

When all you’ve got to eat are marshmallows and sausages, it can help to have a sense of humor.

12. Dogs Are Great At Camping

Seriously, they’re the best at scaring away bears, and they don’t complain about sleeping on the floor.

13. Wind Is Not Your Friend, But Stakes Are

Those little metal things that came with your tent are stakes. Not like the meat. Use them. They help this not happen.

14. Bears: They’re Real, and They’re Real Scary

Don’t leave children unattended. Unless you see a bear, then screw the kids and run.

15. Bikes Before Broads

She has plenty of body heat to keep her warm, but your poor bike is made of metal.

16. Bring A Friend With An Engineering Degree

A little bit of creativity can really go a long way when it comes to making dinner and powering your electronics at the same time.

17. Make Sure You Buy Your Tent From A Reputable Company.

We’re not saying this isn’t a great tent, but something tells us they were more concerned with making this joke than making the tent itself.

18. Okay, Maybe There Are SOME Modern Conveniences You Should Bring…

We think a flask around the campfire should suffice, but for the truly boozy adventurer something more serious might be necessary.

19. Make Sure Your Tent Is Big Enough For Everyone In Your Party

If you rode in on a horse, it’s really rude not to let him sleep in the tent with you.

20. Never Let The Man Keep You Down

Don’t let a sign tell you what to do! Especially if there’s, like, a hundred of you. What are they gonna do, really? Put you ALL in jail? Well, good, because it’s going to rain later, and your tent has a leak. [tps_title][/tps_title]